Stop Assuming… Does anyone else find this annoying??
Posted in Lightbulb Moments on 03. Apr, 2011
Ok – I have been thinking about this post for a couple months.
Why are people generally in such bad moods as they go about their day? Why do we miss the fact that this is all we have – each moment, each day, this is it. Why aren’t we kinder to eachother? Why do people kinda love drama and being angry over nothingness?
WHY WHY WHY ???
I ask that knowing sometimes we do get angry and that’s ok too. But why over the nothing stuff? – that’s what I am referring to here.
I am not even talking about the BIG things. It’s the little things that have got me typing away! Actually it’s the way people regularly ASSUME why you did something or what is going on in a given situation.
Don't Assume...
So this post is about why ASSUMING is NOT COOL…
We make assumptions all day long about why he said, she said, they did, this happened, it must mean, and on and on. And here is a simple example of what I am talking about that happened to me twice over the last few months:
Have you ever found yourself in a public carpark accidentally going the wrong way? Every now and then I do. The second last time was a few months ago. I didn’t realise, but as I safely passed an older gentleman in his car, he made it his business to let me know just how rude I am for doing so. You should have seen the look on his face. I wanted to yell out this to him but I kept quite “Yep, I got up this morning just with the intention of annoying you (well the words I was actually thinking weren’t quite as polite!).
The last time was a few days ago. Again I took a wrong turn and by the time I realised, it was a little late to do anything but safely move on through the carpark and get back on track. As a lady passed me with that familiar look of disgust, I thought to do the right thing. I wound down my window and said ‘sorry about that, these things happen’ thinking that would help and plus it was TRUE. Nope, no such luck.
She wanted to be angry. She wanted to have her say about what a bad person I was for this. She yelled something back at me – it was so fast and high pitched I couldn’t tell what the words were, but the sentiment was clear – she was not happy! But no-one had been inconvenienced, we all moved safely on.
If you are reading this the lady in the car who screamed at me, please know this. I didn’t do it to annoy you or to get my kicks. I made a simple honest mistake. I have a feeling you have done the same as well. And we both will do it again. Please stop assuming we are all out to do wrong towards one another. Most of us aren’t.
All I am saying is that everyday we ASSUME a lot of things. That assuming can cause a lot of sadness and drama. And worst of all, anger within ourselves. For what purpose?
Perhaps we could go a little easier on eachother, practice a little more kindness and wait before we pounce…
Can anyone else relate??
Shine Brightly Live Lightly
Elli J x
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We are humans and humans tend to make their own judgement and assumptions everyday. Sometimes we assume that people are angry with us when there’s a period of silence when there is actually no issue. Be kind and we assume something, be nasty and we assume something else as well. We try to please everyone around us and therefore we give ourselves alot of emotional tension and stress thinking about the reactions and actions of others. Basically at the end of the day the one who assumes is the one who made up the whole situation may it be good or bad. Assumption creates emotions that creates reactions that draws up the whole situation.
Hi Elli, Seriously, sometimes I intentionally go the wrong way, simply because it’s easier and I find people’s ‘stares’ amusing. Sometimes it’s ok to break the rules so long as no one gets hurt. The thing about assuming is it leaves you totally vulnerable of making huge mistakes and looking foolish. We are not mind readers and when we ‘assume’ we are making a decision about what we think is going on, not what we know is going on… I say, leave assumptions to those who like to look foolish and those of us who can actually mindread! Great article xx
Thanks Janelle! I like what you said – and am pretty sure plenty of people go the ‘wrong way’ and end up in the ‘right place’!! Elli xx
Thank you for those words – it is so true that we can be our own worst enemy. Let’s be kinder to ourselves I say x